The Beach.

The biggest affliction most people seem to have is that we all automatically assume that we have all the time in the world to do the things we've been meaning to get around to, and wanting so badly to experience. I realized earlier morning, that this is precisely the reason why death scares most of us. Death is a reminder that time, is indeed a luxury, not a mandate. I've noticed, over the past few months especially, that several people that I care about lack a sense of urgency. It's also come to my attention that some people never take the time out to be actively involved with those they love because they truly believe that when they "find the time" the person that is waiting on them in that moment, will just "be around". That's why phrases like "It'll be here when you get back", "Maybe later/another time" and "There's always next year" put me ill at ease. Even if a life isn't lost between the now we chose to postpone and the later we hope to receive, it usually never comes anyway. There's always something more pressing. Something else to do, someone else to see. Why is that? In the unfortunate circumstance that a life is lost between now and "some other time" then the tears flow. Which I completely understand as a human reaction however, most sadness isn't even based on the actual loss but the memories of the past and the ache of a snuffed out future. Most people are so busy fulfilling  some sort of unspoken societal quota. Filled with the stresses of work or school or both, that of course, is the means to adulthood but yet and still. The time missed doesn't even hit them until they're alone. In the shower, and it's a few months away from a whole new year and you haven't held a hand, kissed a cheek, gave a hug or slapped a five with the loved ones you've been meaning to pop in on but haven't actually been near in months. It looks as though people will never grasp the concept of "the more you put something off the more likely it becomes that you'll never actually get around to it." I brought a new two pieced bathing suit, a week and a half before my twenty-third birthday, When I tried it on, it made me look and feel phenomenal. I brought it with the intention of hitting the beach as much as humanly possible this summer. Anywhere away from my normal routine, with cool water and minimal clothing sounds like freedom to me. Even so, it is now September 10th. my mother's birthday, and I never did make it to the beach. Since August ended, I've been quietly consoling myself, "there's always next year", "maybe in a couple months I'll take a vacation", "there's no need to feel down, I'll have other opportunities for fun." I can't even make myself feel better confidently because I don't know if the things I said to myself, in my own head, are even true. Everyday now, I see that pretty little two piece in my closet and I say "Man, I should've just went to the beach." Bottom line is, spend the time with the ones you love and the ones that love you, before you no longer have the time to spend.